Notes
on the meaning of “success” and “worth”
Some years ago, I saw a
reality TV programme in which a former popular singer seemed to suggest that
the only way to measure success in life was to measure one’s financial wealth.
I was stunned that any experienced, reasonably intelligent and now ageing man
of the world (he was mid-seventies at the time) could be so obtuse, blinkered
and limited in his outlook.
If the sole purpose of a
venture is to make money, this may be viewed as a rather shallow and mercenary affair
whose primary aim is self-advancement, often using the labour and efforts of
others to succeed in this venture. Pride may be taken in quality of product or
service but ultimately it may remain somewhat self-serving and short-sighted in
scope.
Success can also take the
form of realising a burning ambition or attaining a coveted position. Ambition
may allow an individual to overcome challenges and achieve great things, and
ego may play a healthy part in attaining success, but concentration on a
particular outcome and excessive focus on how to achieve that outcome can lead
to a blinkered or short-sighted view of life and may not lead to ultimate
fulfilment.
A broader perspective may
allow an individual to maintain a sense of proportion and to rethink
priorities.
Is it truly fulfilling to
achieve a goal set merely for personal benefit? Is this the act of one who is
ego-driven and narcissistic to the point of failing to consider effects or
impact on others? Of course, ego must play a part and respect should be given
to one who shows the determination and skill to succeed, but if an act is
completely self-serving, does it have the same value as an act that benefits or
pleases others as well as oneself?
Equally, if an individual
acts purely for the benefit of others, his/her actions will lack value and
appreciation as this individual is not making a choice based on the worth of
his/her contribution or perhaps he/she has so little self-respect that he/she
may feel obliged to serve others.
It appears we may wish to
distinguish between “success” and “worth”. Success on its own may be measured
in purely financial or business terms, or in terms of personal achievement, while
worth may be at least partly defined as a recognition of personal qualities and
contributions to a greater whole, or a willingness to help others or perhaps
please others in some shape or form.
There are all manner of
ways in which to help someone; physical aid, emotional support, revealing a
truth or possibly hiding a truth, influence through education and thought,
encouragement to aspire to something, and financial support, to name but a few…
In general, the investing
of one’s own time, effort or material goods to bring about a positive change in
the circumstances, outlook or development of another individual may be
considered worthy.
Of course, ego and
self-respect must play a part in all of this. Selfless devotion to others may
not be appreciated or truly valued. All must learn the value of helpful acts,
even those who engage in the acts. Kindness should not be taken for granted and
while those receiving kindness should indicate appreciation, those offering
kindness have the right to expect it. A simple, sincere “thank you” is
perfectly sufficient but the value of kindness should be recognised as such
acts are not obligations. They are the result of choices made out of freedom
and should be all the more respected and valued for that.
Respect and especially
self-respect are essential elements of worth. If a person acts for selfish
motives or, indeed, purely to please others, their acts may reasonably be
considered less worthy than one who acts to help others but upon reflection of
various aspects of the case and upon evaluation of them. An individual should
judge the merits of a particular case and any action should be based on reason
and consideration of motivation and impact. This process is what gives value to
support or action – it is a choice and not an obligation, and should be
appreciated all the more because of that.
Stuart Fernie (stuartfernie@yahoo.co.uk)
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